Resolutions

I started off 2009 with a set of resolutions that were quite different from my past New Year's Resolutions. It was quite simple, really... Live, Love, Laugh. It seemed quite cheesy at first, but this, by far, has been the first year where I am actually able to live out my resolutions and feel better about life in the process. There are some that I live out on a daily basis and there are some that are yet to come.

LIVE

Life has been very full lately with activities work and non-work related. I've mentioned singing with the Spanish Mass Choir. We will be having a concert on May 3rd as a fundraiser and will then be performing at the 25th Anniversary celebration of our pastor. Guitar classes are progressing; at least I hope that's what my guitar teacher thinks. Work is happily busy. There are plenty of meetings during the day and more in the evenings. Days are spent talking with people, faith sharing, various activities, and lots of laughter. I love it, love it, love it!

I also have a couple of trips lined up. Katrina and I are talking about taking the kids to Disneyland next month. I better work on this because my calendar is getting quite full for the month of April as it is. Another trip that I'm very excited about is the Guadalupe Pilgrimage. Our Pastoral Associate, Barb Anderson, has been taking groups down to Cuernavaca, Mexico and Mexico City for a retreat pilgrimage. Along with her is our Hispanic Ministry Coordinator, Ina Hecker. They are also the ones that I sing with in the choir. I look forward to visiting Mexico and experience this retreat pilgrimage with Barb and Ina.

Since the start of the year I feel as if I grab more opportunities to live my life fuller than I have been. At every turn I feel God's presence and blessings. I feel that when I was able to drop the woe-is-me attitude, God-in-me stepped in!

LAUGH

Laughter has been a huge part of this year. Work is always a good source of laughter with people that I work with. We always manage to talk about topics that lead to laughter. Our pastor, Fr. John, is also very good at entertaining us. I am so very thankful to be in a working environment that encourages time to gather and be a community. Jean Morrison, our Youth Minister, has also brought a lot of laughter into the office. Jean, her husband, Bert, and some other friends also gather from time to time to just have dinner together and laugh all night long. Sometimes we just sit around and talk, others we play games. The blessing of all this is there have been people that I never thought of as friends have now become a part of this lively group. Other people have been brought into my life and have brought so much laughter. I have proof that laughter makes you look and feel younger!

LOVE

My resolution to love has more to do with the love of people that I wish to serve. I was so stressed and burned out by the end of last year that I was struggling inside because my capacity to empathize with the people needing help was feeling diminished. I wanted to be able to help as much as possible, but I was growing more and more tired even annoyed at times. As I look back, I think it was because I was operating on the basis that this was work. My sights were so set on other aspects of love, that I was forgetting to love my neighbors. I had lost sight of those that God really wants me to love. My brain knew who needed to be helped, but my heart was elsewhere. God gave me a heart, though, that can carry all. There's room to love those I already love and more room to love those who need more love.

I find now that when I see the person in front of me as someone God wants me to love, I am able to help them in a way that is good for them as well. I am finding that more of the people that I talk to not only need financial help, but knowing that there is somebody who will care for them when they need it. I can't say that I am to take credit for this because I really think it's something God has placed in my capacity.

He has given me more opportunities to speak of His love with those in front of me than I have ever had. Most recently was a homeless man who was suicidal and homicidal. Those in charge of the homeless shelter think he is bipolar. He found himself in our office needing some spiritual uplifting. I was sitting with my co-workers drinking coffee when he entered the office. He didn't make eye contact with anybody and pretended to read the brochures that we had out front. I went up to him and this led to a lengthy conversation. All he needed was somebody to tell him that he is still loved by God even though he is feeling angry towards him. I had tons of things to do that day, but my heart would not let him out of the door until I felt he was ready to. This is the kind of love that I seek for this year. Love for those hardest to love. Love for those others would turn away. Love for those who God sends my way. There are times when this is the hardest of the three (live, love, laugh) because it is one I have the least control over. Yet it is the most soul-satisfying and helps me to achieve living and laughing.

As we come close to putting a fourth of the year behind us, I look forward to more days of sunshine (oh please, please come already!), opportunities to take in God's awesome creation in the nature that surrounds us, and the priviledge (our duty, really) to be His hands and feet on this earth. I hope to move forward with my resolutions and make it my life goals. As simple as it may seem, it is at the core of how I long to live.